Final Review - Journey of Recognition

    At the close of the Kat Eye Journey of Recognition course, I have mixed emotions.  I don't feel I gave it my "all," due to various life circumstances.  I didn't keep up well with my inspiration files.  I didn't complete all the assignments.  I didn't find myself out in the "field" often and I barely picked up my camera in the last month.  we've been completely overwhelmed with life and lack of time, and I do wish I'd taken the course when I had more time to devote to it.

    That being said, I took away several valuable discoveries.  I learned that I can push through the block and come out with results I love.  I learned that if I want time, I have to force my family to get on board, and I have to kick them out of the house. It's just where we are right now.  I learned that I love the creative results, and I also crave to improve technically so I can achieve the things I want to.  I learned that I love wood!

    As I am driving here and there, I find myself longing to pull over and leap out of the car, set up the tripod, and capture various scenes.  I haven't ever been drawn to landscapes and I'm intimidated by them, which might be 75% of why I don't actually pull over.  It seems that I'm intimidated even by the process of setting up the camera on the tripod.  I hate using the tripod, come to think of it.  The need for a tripod actually stops me.  Huh.

     I had the opportunity to experiment with macro photography, and loved the impact of the photos, although there were so many technical imperfections that I was on the verge of hitting "BUY IT" on a macro lens.  

     I am looking forward to Journey of Inspiration as a redeemer - we'll be all settled in our new place, with new challenges but our weekends won't be spend driving hours and hours and packing and laundry and all that.  My goal going forward is to actually pull over when I feel the pull.  I might not get something out of every shoot, but unless I try, I'm not getting anything!!

    If you have the opportunity to take Kat's classes (button is around here somewhere - click to go to her page), they're phenomenal for anyone in any stage of the photographic journey!

Shake it like a milkshake

I meant to share my little "discovery" which I'm sure isn't novel but it was to me:
To reduce shake when without tripod etc etc in the crappy low light setting as per previous post, put the camera on continuous shooting mode and capture 4-5 images.  The press and release of the shutter button cause shake, but the images in the middle tend to be clearer.  A ha!

Recognizing Inspiration

    As a board certified behavior analyst, today's photojournal prompt is particularly exciting.  What Kat has presented us with is called a task analysis - a breakdown of a more complex skill, like tying shoes or.. making a photograph.  It clicks with my brain's scientific way of thinking.
     When I am at work or trying to figure out my next steps in life, small or big, I always come back to a concept I learned from a marcus buckingham podcast - strengths and weaknesses.  He conceptualizes strengths as things you are good at, yes, but also - ready for it? - things that strengthen you.  He says that things you are good at, but hate, are not actually strengths, but weaknesses.  And worse, because you're good at them, people keep throwing them at you.  I am an excellent interviewer but I hate it - but I get assigned most of the interviews, during which I am just dreaming about being somewhere else.  I am also an excellent materials-maker, and while I am laminating, creating visual supports, etc, time just flies by. I'd do it even if I didn't get paid.  It's a thrill.
    That's what we're looking at here, as well - our strengths and weaknesses in the photographic process.  (PS - something you suck at but love to do is neither a strength or weakness - it's a hobby, lol).
   
     My strengths in the photographic process are: -seeing a subject - since I had my little epiphany, I can sharply identify what exactly it is I wanted to photograph, what about that subject, and am beginning to conceptualize how I want to present that to a viewer. -I love most of the exploration except when technicalities get in the way.  -Review is a thrill, and less and less a surprise (as in, oh, I thought that would be great and it was awful kind of surprise).  -I love sharing with others and receiving feedback.

    My weaknesses are: -Editing is boring.  I also don't have proper editing software, and further, my ultimate goal is for the photographs to require little editing to begin with.  I'm not yet into the editing-as-creative-process part - probably because I haven't been exposed and I don't imagine I'll ever have time for it.  -I never get an end result although putting photos up on the blog is often disappointing because out of their context in my photostream, they're often not as exciting as I thought.  I also find the cropping or color or something about a printed product to be very disappointing when I get them back.  I don't think printing processes have caught up with the digital aspect ratio or something.

     One area of frustration I continue to come up against is lack of equipment to do what I want to do - e.g., my girlfriend would like me to take her new portraits in exchange for providing interior design for my cottage. I want to agree, but I don't have a good portrait lens, reflectors, or the skill to get good SOOTC shots, or any training regarding posing and making people look good - even though it's one of my motivations.

    One area that I see I get jazzed up about over and over is exploring the subject - and letting it reval itself.

   


  a. Intention to photograph b. Seeing a subject c. Exploring/studying a subject with your camera d. Review of your images e. Editing of your images f. Getting an end result – on the wall, on the web, etc. g. Understanding your images h. Sharing with others i. Receiving feedback

Unfamiliar Subject - Photojournal

    When the last lesson from the 4-week Kat Eye: Journey of Recognition course arrived in my mailbox, I could hardly believe it.  Life, the universe, and bad lighting seriously impaired my ability to keep up with this class, and I have been blessed with amazing "virtual" classmates that have formed a real, vibrant online community and classroom.  I hope someday Kat will sponsor a retreat and we will all get away together with our cameras and our array of personalities.  I also hope it will be in Oregon, because 1) I've always wanted to go there and 2) I think I want a tattoo from this place in Oregon that I can't remember the name of.

    The silver lining is that we have another course coming up almost immediately, the Journey of Inspiration.  So, I have hope.

    However, I don't think it was ONLY my life that got in the way  -  it was my self too.  I think I intimidated myself, set my expectations too high, had a few amazing breakthroughs and experiences in Starting the Journey, and got fearful and too expectant.

     So today I kicked everyone out of the house, didn't bother about the fact that the lighting is subpar, and decided to tackle photographing an unfamiliar object, from a couple weeks back.  I usually lean towards my daughter, or natural backgrounds like wood, and shooting outdoors, so I figured I would try some depression glass that I needed to photograph anyhoo.

     

     During the exercise (photos are here), I started out frustrated because I just wanted to capture this little glass, and 1) the light bites, 2) I couldn't get an uncluttered background 3) my camera is notorious for a lot of noise at high ISOs, 4) my husband took my todder AND my tripod, argh.  I wasn't interested in this, and then I put the little glass on the wooden bench and added some mirrors to try to capture more natural light.  Still boring. I added a different piece (with branches, of course) and got more into it - there was some texture, and interest, and something in the glass jar spoke to me.  Then I came around the corner, like Kat trained us to do, and there was the little jar, looking at itself.  In that angle, time got lost, things came together, and the little vignette in the previous post was born.

     Joke's on me: I ended up using the natural element as a backdrop, of course, and sticking with the wide aperture, of course.. but I tried, I opened up the creative gates again, and I'd still like to try sports or architecture, but once again, can't let perfect get in the way of good. I think that the challenges of light and glass, which fades into many backgrounds, made this a challenge for me.  Regardless, I feel very emotional about the results.  There was something very touching to me about objects examining themselves in the mirror, about the branches reaching out of the tiny jar, about the tiny old webs hanging off the branches, and finally, the brilliance and transcendence of the light on the glass and mirror.  The whole process gave me some hope about our situation and my mental state right now.

Unfamiliar subject- the pics

Dual Identity

Escape

Haunted

shine

La-De-Da, Foggy Day

Does anyone else remember the terrific children's CD "In Harmony"?  If you have a child in your life, you've got to look it up. There's a great song about a sailor and a mermaid, singing "la de da, foggy day, ship ahoy, and by the way..."
    This morning I was late for work as always and my charming little bubba insisted on using an umbrella in the drizzle. The last thing that would occur to me would be to pull out the camera in the fog and rain but this umbrella obsession just screams to be documented, and why let perfect get in the way of good when you also have a "weird light" assignment to fulfill!?

I absolutely loved the misty, faded look that the 8am light filtered through the fog lent to these photographs.  Obviously we didn't have much time for composition or anything like that, especially as it's impossible to photograph a kid-on-wheels safely, when standing that close to the street.  However, if I could wrap the camera in a baggie and do some planning with vintage-inspired palettes, I'd love to do a rainy/foggy photoshoot.  Don't you think this soft look has potential? 

Intuitive Photojournal - in the dark

It's not a very good photo, or a very flattering photo, and it might seem like I'm flipping the bird but I was just using a remote control.  It was a party, a friend's 50th party, and they announced they had gotten married, which would be unremarkable except that gay marriage is finally legalized in NY and these guys, who have been together longer than most married couples I know, finally tied the knot.

I dragged my camera along to the party even though I don't really have the equipment to be shooting a party in the dark.  I figured I could at least set up a "photo booth" to document the guests.
     Things didn't turn out like I planned. The second I got the camera on the tripod, folks started leaping in front of it. I should be so lucky.. except that the camera was still set to something involving bright light and sunflowers.  While trying to get the settings right, I accidentally shot this photo of myself.  And I'm sharing it with the internet because although it's a horrible photo of me, it pretty much sums it up at this moment.  Every time I come across it, my heart hurts for her.  She is in the dark, she's emerging, and she's none too happy about what she sees out there.

Take a Walk on the Wild Side

Glad to see rock n roll is still alive in NYC. Sort of.

Sunflower maze

This charming maze is found in Augusta, NJ and is only around for a couple of weekends; it's interesting to be inside something so robust and ephemeral at the same time.

Don't they look like they're in a cult?

Doesn't it look like this sunflower is being strangled?

Don't you love the way these look like a proud mama and papa sunflower, beaming down on their little one?

Rules that are meant to be broken

-my pictures need someone else to like them besides me and therefore I have to frame/expose/etc in a technically proper way
-i take too many pics of my child therefore i should force myself to take pictures of other things
-it's unlikely i will ever be good at this in a way that other people appreciate therefore i should stop taking pictures of anything
-if i say i like photography people will expect something from my pictures so i should keep my hobby to myself

those are a lot of limiting beliefs but not stylistic limitations/rules... let me think about that a little bit more.

The Most Uplifting Photowalk Eve-ah

    After the terrific experience with the All America Pick Up Truck Dude, I continued my photo walk down to a serene little park.  It's a park I've visited probably 500 times in my life, from the time I was a teenager until now.  It's pretty aesthetically B-O-R-I-N-G, with a big plastic primary colors playground, a few boats, and no real flowers or landscaping to speak of.  Still, I had never wandered down there with a camera.  It was kind of hot and I'd sat out on the asphalt trying to practice panning, so I didn't have high hopes.  What I found was the most uplifting photowalk ever!

Can't you just pictures some 'tweens, defying their stereotype as valley-girl princess-culture-riddled airheads, sitting around going "How can we change the world?"  "Hey," says one, "Let's get some chalk and send some positive energy out there!"  

On my way out of the park, I found these pretty terrific messages too.  Do you think the universe wanted me to have a nice day?

Enjoy, spiritual beings!

Panning

I sat on a hot ass street corner for about an hour today trying to get the hang of panning.  While I don't think I quite had a success, I learned a lot.  I got a couple boring sedans on partially blurred backgrounds, but at least it was progress from blurred boring sedans on a blurred boring background.

The flag caught my eye and I thought if I could get the right car at the right time, I could have some kind of excellent statement about Americana, maybe I could grab a classic car or a Camero or something...

I got an all around blurry mess, but closer:

 And this priceless, priceless shot of the American Dream:

Could you love that guy more?  

Then I messed around with the shutter speed for shiggles, just to practice lining up a car with the flag. I don't think it's the last I've seen of this flag...

Lessons from the Birdhouse

     the beauty of the creative juice is that once it gets flowing, there's no end to the reserves!  After photographing a birdhouse yesterday for about an hour, I finally had to tear myself away to get the baby from daycare.  Once my "eye" was opened, I could have pulled over about 1,000 times to photograph all kinds of things - a yellow fire hydrant contrasting against the natural grasses at the beach... an 18 wheeler zooming through the tiny beach penninsula on which the daycare sits... the beautiful rock retaining walls and the boats and the windsurfers and the abandoned military structure and the and the and the... 

    Instead of hopping out everywhere, I did a lot of thinking about the images I wanted to capture as I drove the length of the beach, especially how I could compose them and why I was drawn to them.  And like the birdhouse, I came to realize - it's not the precise visual representation of what I'm seeing that draws me to photography.  Further, it's my attempt to precisely capture what I see that frustrates me.  I can take a picture of a fire hydrant and beach grasses - and it would leave me flat, even though it's exactly what I saw.

     But if I were to compose the picture so that the weathered yellow paint and bright green grasses took over the frame, or put the hydrant on the right or left side, or blurred the hydrant and focused on the awesome fence behind it... I'd be looking at a photograph that moves me and captures the elements that drew me in - the contrast, the idiosyncrasy of a man made object on the natural beach.  

     For me, the goal of photography is no longer to capture what I see - it's to communicate the elements of the scene that attracted me, to find a way to evoke the feeling of the person behind the camera. That is probably obvious to everyone else.  The weathered shingles on the beach homes lining a charming block, rather than the cluttered entire block.  The end of the 18 wheeler as it zooms out of the frame, which is otherwise filled with natural, stationary elements.  The planter, not necessarily the plant all the time.  

     Thanks to Kat Eye and to the BetterPhoto courses I was taking this last month, the world of photography is finally open to me, and finally realizing that the person behind the camera actually counts... I can't wait to get out there and capture the world.

intimacy with a birdhouse

     I feel like I had sex with this birdhouse.  I now know it from every single angle and I'll never look at it the same way again.  Today I decided to have a "familiar subject" redo with a something that doesn't move, and I've been courting this little birdhouse from afar for a couple weeks, since I started the Kat Eye course. Here was my funny little romp in the yard.

Well, that's a scene that turns out to be more complicated through the lens than it was from the window.  Phone wire, too many objects on the bench.  From what I'm learning, I took out some clutter to simplify.

 But it still wasn't enough.  

Now the cheese stands alone.  Rule of thirds alone couldn't help me, though.

Tried a different angle... hmm.  Meh.

Getting more intimate... now we're getting somewhere.

Even closer.... Took about 100 of these.  

Let's look at it from a different angle - I usually get "stuck" or caught up in one angle, like with the little rocking chair.  It took this assignment to remind me to stand up or lie down or SOMETHING.

Which of course drew me into the bench...

Which to me turned out to be as interesting as the birdhouse.  There's that wood/texture thing cropping up again.

And while I was over there, surprise! Look at that cute miniature log pile and those nice bench lines.

Let's try a totally different angle.. now I'm lying down in the dirt and another surprise through the lens- a lovely late afternoon light through the trees, that really evokes the feeling of this little corner of the world.

After all of that, in the end it wasn't the bench, the house on the bench, the whole scene, or any other elements that really evoke the feeling I felt when I looked out the window at the little house. It was this tiny detail that I fell in love with, and when I look at it, I feel serene and drawn to go outside and sit on the bench:

There were so many surprises on this multi-angle journey... One new angle leading to a new detail which led to another and another... I loved it!